We all lead such elaborate lives

When last we left our heroes, they were travelling to Reedsburg, WI for the night.

Upon arriving in Reedsburg, we went to check into our accurately named hotel – the Hotel Reedsburg. We pulled up to what Andy accurately described as Sketchburg – and proceeded to be checked into the hotel by a ten year old boy named Ben Patel. (it should be noted that we assumed his name is Ben because the wireless password for the joint was benpatel) We walked into the office, where he was sitting on a couch doing his English homework. He got up, went behind the desk, and confirmed our reservation. He gave us the keys and sent us to our room.

Hold on to your hats, ladies and gentlemen. It gets weirder.

We opened the door of our hotel room to find a 1970s chic room with a great view of the parking lot. I’ve always wanted my very own bright orange sink. After unloading bags into the room, we went to the picnic area – complete with merry-go-round and slide. We set off to see the sights of humble little Reedsburg. We found a few gems, to say the least.

Bent and Dent Groceries - a family favorite

One of these such gems was the Bent and Dent Grocer, a shabby shack that sold unwanted food items. I picked up a box of Slim Fasts for a mere 1.99, the only thing wrong with them was that the box was, you guessed it, bent and a couple of cans were, right again, dent. All in all, a great deal – and it has saved me mucho dinero in meals.

Upon returning to our palace, we settled in for the night and (except for the paranoid fear of bed bugs, which was unfounded in fact I should add) had a decent first night of tour.

The next morning we packed up and got the hell out of there as fast as possible. We had sights to see. On the way to House on the Rock, I read aloud chapter six of American Gods. Each page was a mouthwatering teaser for the glory that was awaiting us. We pulled up as we read the last sentence of chapter 6.

The Infinity Room, about 8 feet from the tip of it. Prospective is a bitch.

The House on the Rock is a roadside attraction in Spring Green, WI. Basically Alex Jordan built this house in 1950 and started charging admission for people to come inside. It is worth every cent.

I can’t tell you why it’s so awesome. It just is. It is home to the world’s largest carousel, a life-size sculpture of a whale being attacked by a giant octopus, mechanically played orchestras, and a million random trinkets and stuffs. The highlight of the tours (of which there are three sections) is the infinity room, a needle-shaped room that jets out over a valley. It creaks when you walk on it, because it is suspended in mid-air. I’m sure it’s safe and supported, but I wouldn’t want to be in the infinity room with too many people (though it would make an excellent wedding location….)

The ticket taker estimated it take three hours to go through the house. We got to the House on the Rock shortly after they opened at 9 am and left at 3 pm. It was amazing.

The Red Room, it's orchestra, and ourselves

One disturbing part of the House on the Rock is the fortune-teller Esmeralda, who is a mechanical mannequin who dispenses fortune cards. There are two such machines in the exhibits, and they are mentioned in American Gods so we couldn’t resist either of them. Andy’s fortunes were pleasant. Mine, not so much. In fact, they are downright awful. I suppose I should watch my back.

Esmeralda's First Fortune

And the second Esmeralda foretold the following:

Esmeralda's Second Prophecy

It was a good time, regardless of my fortune (or perhaps because of it) and afterwards we set off towards Tennessee. Along the way, I’m reading American Gods aloud to Andy, who prefers to drive. We have many more adventures to cover in the next nine weeks. We arrived here, in Johnson City, TN around 7 and have been prepping for our early morning performances tomorrow. Get ready, TN, because we are ready to rock your world.

Did I mention that I love my job?

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